Panel – The end of Stage 2

Firstly, sorry for the delay in getting this blog up, lots having been going on mainly with the little guy being quite unwell (tonsillitis) as well as other adoption issues and now its the half-term. One of the things that I’m learning quickly is that school kids have so many school holidays!! (he’s only been at school since feb and its his third school break…..if only I could have that many breaks from work!!). Anyway here it is……..

The day had finally arrived. The end of our adoption assessment was almost over and the start of finding our future son could begin.

We had a mid morning panel time slot, which was great so at least we could take our time getting ready and not have to wait all day for the panel assessment. We were asked to meet our social worker at her office reception before we went to panel. We met her and she gave us another overview of how the panel meeting will go. When we got to where the panel meeting would take place we were taken to another room with our social worker to wait. This was the most nerve-racking time of our lives, for me much more daunting than when I met with the registrar before I got hitched! Finally the chair person and another social worker came into the room and introduced themselves, we had already met the social worker who led the two day assessment days (no words needed here about how I felt meeting her again!!!). The chair person gave an outline how things would go and reassured us that he would be asking most of the questions, and just to direct our responses to him. He told us that some of the other panel members might have some questions for us but there shouldn’t be many.
Our social worker was called in first and would have been asked about us, our relationship and how we have progressed throughout the process, all of which would have been in the report that was also presented to the panel.

After 15 or so minutes we were then asked to join the panel. Our social worker remained present for our interview. The panel consisted of the chairperson (who was independent to the social services), a few social workers and their medical advisor. We were asked lots of questions relating to our relationship, I feel this was partly due to the comment made by the assessing social workers during our assessment days. Again we repeated back to them what we had said numerous times since the assessment day and this was well received by the chairperson. Other questions asked off us, were our relationship and how do we support each other, when do we know if the other one is struggling (clearly due to both our history of depression and anxiety), we were also asked about our house sale and my studies whether either of these would impact our adoption and bringing up a child. Naturally, we answered these truthfully which was really well received. Following these questions by the chairperson I was asked a question by the medical advisor about my surgery and how things are going and if anything else needs sorting. We were then asked to go back to the waiting room along with our social worker whilst they made a decision on our adoption application.

This was the worst wait, much more unsettling than the wait to go in! Our future was being decided in another room, everything we had worked for over the past 10 months or so was being decided and all we could do was wait. Finally after what felt like years the chairperson and social worker came in the room. It was good news, we were now approved prospective adopters. All the stress, tears and anxiety was completely worth it. All that was to be done now was the search for the missing piece to our family. We left the building with our social worker followed by a massive group hug. We couldn’t have been more happy. Our social worker said that she would be in touch later in the week.

We left for some celebratory drinks, one of the best days of our life. Our future was closer than we thought. The only thing left to do now was to sell the apartment and find our family home.

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